How do we get out of the victimization and re-victimization that makes us vulnerable?

Victims and perpetrators live together daily on the street, passing each other on the subway, in the neighborhood, in the same family and I wonder what we do with that? How do we resignify ourselves? How do we get out of the victimization and re-victimization that makes us vulnerable? We move in an environment in which, while our being is trying to move forward, there are professionals and the media that tirelessly tire out messages of despair and revenge: an abused person does not recover any more, a raped person even less so, the The murder of a loved one forces you to become a macabre and vengeful being, a robbery victim makes you a person full of rage because you could not or did not know how to take care of your private property, etc. Thus we can enumerate each one of the crimes that we want and if we let these messages operate on our capacity for discernment and our will, we would see that their influence would turn us into people without greatness or capacity for transformation and would make us blind towards the other, that he shares the same space, that he is a human being and that he inevitably lives together with the victim. Then countercultural movements, almost miraculous, happen, like VxP in which they talk about coexistence, integration, pacification, despite how difficult it is to install these issues in a society like ours.

I was the victim of a serious crime. It has cost me a lot to forgive and forgive myself, I have worked a lot on myself and it has been a long and difficult task for me, especially to get out of the role of victim. Get out of the cliché imposed by "common sense" that the victim "is broken", that without a happy childhood you don't have a happy life. Based on that traumatic experience, I carried out a reconstruction of myself.

I am a mediator, that is, I dedicate myself, study and put into practice conflict management for a peaceful coexistence, and I know firsthand how difficult and hard it is to confront conflicts, even if they are minor. That is why I understand that what VxP proposes is not at all simple, that it attempts a path, that of peace, so little traveled that sometimes it seems that it is building the path as it goes. But this would not be possible were it not for the fact that VxP is made up of people who have taken a quantum leap in life. And what is that jump about? How did they do it? And what do they think about the lives of others? How are they with other conflicts? These are questions that we should be able to answer in order to make some generalizations (even if they are unfair). First and only keyword: love. Love: positive feeling that makes us be close to our kind, generous and clear humanity.

Second: protagonism. To stop being a victim, you have to be the protagonist of your own life, you have to take charge and act with pain and backpacks on your back, knowing that only each one of us can try to transform ourselves to live together, to pacify. Because the offenders (some with intention, others without intention) are everywhere and they are also victims, but that difference, which is subtle and also very important, should make us leave the pontificating postulates of good and evil, and only then, Seeing the interactions, the interdependencies is that we can run from dark places, from feelings that shrink our heads and hearts and be people who come together in movements like VxP and who only understand life from a compassionate perspective, from love.

November 17, 2017 - Quequen - Argentina